"if it wasn't this, it'd be something else"

Observed a situation today that rivals my own worst story in both irony and crappiness. (Shut up, spellchecker.) It's tempting to say something like "it's almost worse to watch it happen from the outside and not have any way to help" but that'd be total crap. No. It's worse to have it happen to you. So much worse. And while I'm glad that it's not possible and I don't have to make the choice, I'm not at all sure I'd rather it happen to me than someone else. I just want to reiterate one more time: it hurts like nothing else on Earth.
I feel like I have to repeat myself, partly to make it absolutely clear that I'm not viewing this lightly, and partly to break out of the dominant perception of the female half of any relationship, which is that we don't particularly ever hurt. We might not enjoy being carried off by a dragon, but mostly it's life in general that simply terrifies us, rather than the loss, or absence, or betrayal of a loved one. Literature and folk traditions are both full of female protagonists (heroine seems a strong word) who wither away and die at the death of their lover, but their lover is always on the same side... either there's some guy also dying for her love, or he was in love with her, or something. Male protagonists have unrequited love all the freakin time. But for some reason I don't see it carry over often. Perhaps I'm wrong? No examples are springing to mind.
But at any rate, she had just found out her boyfriend was cheating on her (now, do I have this information as gospel? No. But she believed she had and that is all that matters.) at the beginning of choir, after which the following songs were sung:

He's gone away for to stay a little while
but he's comin back if he goes ten thousand miles
Oh who will tie my shoes, and who will glove my hand
and who will kiss my ruby lips while he is gone?
gone away, look away over yandro.
he's gone away for to stay a little while
but he's comin back if he goes ten thousand miles
oh it's pappy'll tie my shoes, and mammy'll glove my hands
and you will kiss my ruby lips when you come back
oh he's gone, look away, over yandro.
(This is a very 70s arrangement but I'm amazed it was on Youtube at all.)


Don't know why there's no sun up in the sky
Stormy weather--since my man and I ain't together
Keeps on rainin all the time
Life is bare, gloom and misery everywhere
Stormy weather--just can't get my poor self together
I'm weary all the time
When he went away the blues walked in and met me
If he stays away old rockin' chair will get me
All I do is pray the Lord above will let me
Walk in the sun once more
Can't go on, everything I had is gone,
Stormy weather--since my man and I ain't together
Keeps rainin all the time
Keeps on rainin all the time
..ELLA.

And finally, the killer (I was impressed, I would have left long before this):

When I fall in love, it will be forever
Or I'll never fall in love
In a restless world like this is
Love is ended before it's begun
And too many moonlight kisses
Seem to cool in the warmth of the sun
When I give my heart
It will be completely
Or I'll never give my heart
And the moment I can feel that
You feel that way too
Is when I fall in love with you.

Ouch. There's not a lot else to say to that. Brings back a lot of song-related memories. I don't really know her well enough to do much besides offer brief sympathy, but the only remedy that ever worked for me (Ha! I said it worked!) was driving 50 down Dredge with all the windows down, blasting the half-broken Forrest Gump tape from Gary's house at full volume (usually loud enough to drown me out) and the bass cranked.
Used to cut off right at the "I've got to make the best of-- (best of--)" in the second to last verse, turn over with a big clutchy noise, and go to "Hound Dog", already in progress.
Rewind. Repeat. Drive further out of the way as necessary.
There's worse things than having no entangling alliances, I suppose. Less painful, anyway.